I expected to see Many men with long beard and shalvar kamiz:

Similar story of women puttying on Burka, but I had the feeling that most of the men have their beard fully shaved, and some not shaved, but I didn’t see that much of LONG beard! One of my friends here had a nice story that when the Taliban left, there were no space in the hairdressers, every body was busy with shaving their beard off. He said that he wasn’t daring to shave off, imagine five years not shaving ANY hair off your face! (even as girl I can feel it!) You would wonder how would you look like, especially when you are young. He said it took him two weeks to shorten his beard part by part!

I expected to see not many women with Jador (Borka):

Actually I saw a lot of women who covered their faces, either in traditional way (you absolutely do not see any thing of face) or just with normal scarf, that you could see their eyes. I would say at least half of the women were like that, I heard in Kabul there are less women covering up. I did see more of young women not covering up. I expected that maybe I need to put on Borgau too, I realized that it was not necessary. I didn’t go to any place that needed to cover myself. The story with women and Hejab is very complex story. I’ll write about what I understood later.



This is me, believe me!
I didn’t have to put on Burka, but I just wanted to try to make a photo. Look carefully do you see my eyes?

What did I expected of Kabul before I come here? Part I

The following posts might become a little more serious! my scientific side is coming up sometimes!

I expected to see:

1. Ruined houses because of war: I saw many of ruined houses and many construction works. For days an area called Makroyan, which is in one side of river was the front line of war, different Mojahedin groups were shooting from both sides of Kabul river passing trough the city. You can still see the bullet holes and ruined houses in this area. The area is build with big concrete apartments from communist’s times, very similar to what I saw last month in some areas in Dresden (East Germany). I also saw many houses and apartments which were newly built. These were very out of concept, and ugly to be honest! In the area with many ruined houses and dirt road with big holes in the street, suddenly you can see a pretty house with mirror worked walls, colorful stones and modern windows. Big gardens and lots of security wires on top of walls. I like to see how the city would look like in ten years from now.
Also it was surprising that most of the pretty old houses, which now turned to high class restaurants (mainly for foreigners), were hidden behind a very dirty ugly walls, with a big door. I wouldn’t ever expected to see a big garden behind the walls. You would go inside and totally forget about outside.



"Old part of city: Shar e Kohneh"




"Makroyan houses"




"Destroyed houses"




"New build house: often happens in the middle of totally ruined street a newly build house".


2. Very crowded streets like in south of Tehran: true, there were a lot of people in the streets, especially around the market (Bazar) near the river. Also too much traffic, not as much as Tehran, but similar. In the evening the city was deserted though!








3. To be very cold: Not too bad! The temperature drops pretty fast here, but I was lucky with timing, spring is coming!. During days was really nice and sunny, beside of couple of days of rain. But evenings are pretty cold. Past winter was one of the coldest winters, for long time the temperature stayed below zero. Here the houses do not have any good isolation, there is no gas and people use a lot of wood to warm up. If you are rich your windows are actually have glass, otherwise it is plastic.

Arriving in Kabul

The flight landed around 11:30. We were sitting in front so we could take off quickly. The line for women and men were separated. You could see people who had somebody that they knew would go right away to the front! The airport looks like the war ruins, BIG block of concrete and damn cold I didn’t dare to make any photo, I didn’t want to stick out as tourist. I had my black scarf tightly closed, it was not necessary, there were so many women that they just had a colorful narrow scarf on. I was the first in the women line, while the solder was checking my passport, a pretty well dressed guy who was chatting to the immigration officer (they knew each other apparently) told me, OH you are Iranian! I thought you were from USA! I was damn scared; this guy had his eyes on me since I was in Dubai! And in all the security things they tell you to be sure that people do not get the idea that you are stranger and try to stay anonymous! I was really annoyed.
Then I went to fill in the forms, obligatory for foreigners, they say to keep eyes on them.



"Arrival hall!"



"Just outside of departure hall"


A guy came to me and said Oh you are Maryam jan? (jan is a word that we use in Persian for people who are very very close to you, but I gathered later that here they use it as a sort of respect, as well as being friendly), I remember I got so shock that I just stared at the guy. Who told me that Hashem jan, (the guy who was going to pick me up) could not come inside and he is waiting outside, I am working here and I came to pick you up, he kept saying that ,God is nice, such a lucky incident. I just saw you and I thought it should be Maryam jan! I was really confused, I sort of went close to my Bodyguard! (military contractor), and asked him to keep eye on me. I was really scared, since I saw all the foreigners were totally closed up and they just collected in a small group in the corner waiting for their suitcases, and Afghans were very happy and noisy. They were at home, I was sort of insider and outsider. I could hear and understand their joy of being home, it would be just the same as in Tehran airport when you arrive, but I didn’t know this people, and I was a foreigner too. I could feel closer to all of these European NGOs people, because I was also totally aware of security issues, etc. At last the luggage were arrived, we walked out of the hall to the open area, which was not stones or asphalt or any ting else except of plain muddy ground. With some buildings, which were totally torn down, I felt I am walking in war zone. The first impression: contradiction of ruined and destroyed area with laugh and happiness of families visiting home, nonmilitary foreigners who were scared and wanted to be as invisible as possible and solders who were happy to be back on their jobs.



"Departure area of Kabul airport"




"Old airport"


In the open space I felt more calm, and I didn’t mind walking and dragging my suitcase in the mud, reminded me of when I was ten, living in Manjil, it was the same sticky mud!

I saw Hashem for the first time, he is really nice guy who took care of me, and drove me around all the time I was in Kabul. Later I learned that he wanted to go to Dushanbe (Tajikistan) for new year. (He is from Tajik part of Afghanistan) but he canceled it for taking care of me.

I felt at home.

The flight

The flight

The same routine of yesterday; passing trough custom, (I was very much relieved to get back my passport back though), getting coffee in the same shop, standing in the same lines ,and finally we were really transferred to the airplane.
In the coffee line I met a Dutch guy. We started to talk and actually came out that he lives also in Utrecht. Amazing! What a small world. We sat in the plane next to each other and talked Dutch, he was working in Afghanistan for a long time, very interesting guy who had traveled and worked in many places in the world. He told me living and working in Afghanistan is HARD! It is the end of the world. We chatted a lot about the political situations, feeling of people, and of course about Iranian politics, Ach! This Ahmadi Nejad name is just pinned to all Iranians forehead! He is so controversial that every body wants to hear from you what you think is in his brain. I wish at least he was just a bit as smart as what, his unbelievable acts, makes people to think he is.
The food was smelly, I didn’t dare to eat. But any way it was less than three hours flight.

Flying over mountains, was breath-taking, so pretty, it was lots of snow. And high, you would feel you can just jump there, no shelter no road, so wild! We were lucky to have a clear sky, so the view was fantastic. When we got to Afghanistan, in a few minutes we got very high altitude, it looked that you are climbing a high slope with your car!. Dutch guy said it is because of security. To avoid rackets from the mountains who might shoot towards airplanes. OH! I felt that when we were making round in Kabul’s sky, to decrease the altitude. The airplane had to go around the city and clime down.

Just a flash back to one of the many talks I had in the trip:
Roles: A (a young military contractor) and me (Maryam)

Me: How long are you going to stay here?
A: Another 6 months or so.
Me: where have you been before?
A: in Iraq, for 6 months
Me: Ouy! Wasn’t it dangerous?
A: it is OK!
Me: did you like it there?
A: no it was really shit! But I love Afghanistan. Here is raw, it is harsh and it is wild!
Me: but now it is getting hard too isn’t it?
A: more danger more money!
Me: Aha, so you work for a bit and then retire?
A: that’s the plan, I need to work for another 6 months or so , then it is 3 years I am in the business.

I was confuse, I loved his honesty, we talked a lot about so many other things, I didn’t dare to ask him how many people has he killed, or if he ever has done. It was weird; he seemed really cool and nice guy. Reminded me of the movie ”Bodyguard”!

And maybe that’s why, that I stuck to him, in case if I need protection.
I was a little sacred of what am I going to encounter. I trusted the people who will come to pick me up. But any how I’ve never met them, or really talked to them. I just arranged all the trips based on trust of who knows whom! And all based on a friend of mine said this to a fiend of yours, and…
I noticed as we were approaching Kabul, and especially in Kabul airport, all the foreigners became totally aware. People weren’t talking that much and the faces became like ice cold, except of military guys. They were there just on job.

I didn’t get that much sleep!

Khaleh, Afghans call all ladies Khaleh; means aunty and I started to call the old lady, Khaleh too. She has a son and grandson in another part of United Imarets, which is about two hours away from Dubai. She hasn’t met them for almost 4 years. I learned that she is living with her other child in Denmark. I was really impressed with her courage of traveling half of the world with herself while she is absolutely illiterate! Any how when her children heard that all the flights from Dubai is cancelled they had tried to find her. And they succeeded just at 6pm, when I was hoping that I can get a long night sleep! The story is she needed to get visa to be able to get out of the airport and visit her family, but now she was in the city. It was a dramatic, emotional reunion ;-) suddenly there were 4 extra people in our hotel room. Very sweet. I didn’t mind sitting there and seeing them talking in their sweet Dari language, which now I got used to it. Some times can be very confusing since they use different word usage than in Persian we speak in Iran.

So I got to learn so much about the family, and hear all the stories. They were a middle class family, who had hard time to support themselves and also during the years of war have been refugee in different places, Iran, Pakistan and at the end in Dubai. Her son has a wife and daughter who meets them just two times a year. They live in Kabul, but he is working in Dubai to earn some money. I thought this is hard!
Around midnight they decided to go to the city, it seems that there are some shops that are open 24 hours. Her son wanted to buy a dress for her 4 years old daughter, but he wouldn’t know how tall she is; I was trying to choose something fun! But they told me it should be long.

They were very nice people, very simple and kind. We got back to hotel, I slept for an hour and Khaleh prayed to thank god for letting her meeting her family. Her children were kidding her that you prayed to god for preparing the condition on meeting each other, god accepted your wish but it cost 14 people going to hospital! And the whole airport was closed! (referring to the accident) we were joking with her and laughing so much.

OK! Why did I come to Kabul?

Make it short: curiosity;
I wanted to see the country. I have met so many Afghans in Iran, and never learned about them, we speak the same language, they were part of Iran until less than two centuries ago. And I always had a feeling that we treated them horribly, I know I cannot judge any thing considering circumstances. it is just my personal idea.

Also I wanted to see if I ever wanted to work in the hard condition, can I do that? What would be my reaction to the insecurity, war, etc. which I‘ve experienced them myself in much milder condition that people have done here. It is always a romantic feeling of working to make a little change for people. But is it just a hype, or do I really feel honestly I want to do that? How good can I react to this situations? How do I like it?

I had a good excuse too, which is true! I wanted to see Afghan Nowrooz. The Persian new year which is celebrated in the countries in the region, especially in Tajikistan, Afghanistan and Iran. Date is 21st of March for arrival of spring. These countries have been trough totally different historical changes and I was interested to see how these differences effected the ancient Nowrooz rituals.
I making programs for Radio Zamaneh. Where I am working there as a (sort of professional hobby). You can read and listen to my reports in Persian there.

I learned that it is not possible to be tourist there. So I contacted (trough friends) a cultural and political organization, who hosted me in Kabul, called Arman Shahr. It is a wonderful group of young people, working to build up their country. I am taking interviews and doing a research on women movement in Afghanistan.

Also I am taking some stuff, for a children project, which is about the schools in the Netherlands and two schools in Afghanistan. I think it is great project. And I am really happy to (totally by chance), got to know and help the project less than a week before I arrive in Kabul.

Some more stuff too, any way I made myself enough busy to have the vacation I want in Afghanistan! I wanted to travel around, but it looks getting difficult. It is snow and cold. The roads are very busy before Nowrooz. No flight and insecurity because of suicide bombers we see what happens. …………

Here I write the stories for my friends, who might be as curious as me to know what is happening in a country beside the war news. People live here! And there is life.
I keep the people anonymous, and whom I talk about I have asked directly for permission. Now I am not having the good internet connection to put on the photos and videos. I try to upload some thing in http://rebel.tv , I put the rest online when ever I got to higher speed internet.

going to Kabul

I go to Kabul. I write the story here, now there is no time to write alot, but I write why did i come ....

one night in Dubai

My flight was canceled. I expected to board at 7:30 am to the flight towards Kabul. But it was 8 am and I had no idea why nothing was announced, I was confuse since no body was around to even ask, I also saw some Iraqis ladies who were flying to Basreh with Iraq airline and I saw them being around again! They had got my attention because of their very pretty dresses, I have never seen some thing like that before, long skirts with a sort of dress on top it, very colorful, with lots of hand work on it. Any way I would give any thing just to be able to sleep some where, the chairs where very uncomfortable to sleep and I wasn’t daring to lay down on the ground. Around 9 am I realized that all the flights were cancelled because of accident which had happened with a Singapore airline while it was taking off. It was a big caos, and it was interesting to see how people are reacting to that, so much of rumors about how many people were killed or so, next day I heard it was just one person who ha to go to hospital and another 14 people got some brouses.

Around 10 am they collected our passports. The reason: for the immigration we were registered as we had left the country so they had to again register us as getting in to the country. I was really scared to give my passport away, I wasn’t alone , it was an Italian guy who was freaking out too, he was working in Italian embassy.
There were a lot of foreign workers, from different countries. I got to talk to an Australian, and a South African security guys who were working in military bases and US embassy, a girl who was doing internship to build a an art school, a girl from a small French NGO working for women organizations. Also two Egyptian guys who were working as contract workers. An interesting German boy, who was working in the afghan providences with a German NGO to set up help for post war traumas. He was coming back from Darussalam, where he had a training program for some workshops, and decided to skip his week of vacation work, to be with his German friends. Last week one of his colloquies had got shot and that was a big thing for German developing workers.

There were also an interesting couple who have a big mobile (telecommunication) company, in Afghanistan; later, I learned that they are one of the main providers, and people think they are too expensive. He was very talkative and funny.

Giving back the passports took too long. There were announcing almost every 10 minutes: “Dubai airport is nonsmoking airport, there are some designated area for smokers ” . This became a big joke between people. Imagine you are stuck there with no information and no idea of what is happening, and some random guys come and take your passport!! Nevertheless they remind you of not smoking!

At last they came, to give back the passports, it was hilarious! Imagine an Arab guy who is trying to read all this strange foreign names. And can not read them! And just show the passport from far away and asks, whose is this? Well we had lots of fun there. Every body got his passport. Except of people who had Afghan passport as well as me and the Egyptian guys! Problem: we needed visa to get out of the air port! So now? “Wait it is going to be arranged in half an hour!” OK! Lets a get a coffee, and smoke in designated area!

Well it wasn’t too bad. In these situations people become friends, I heard so many stories from one of the Egyptian guys. He lived and worked in Afghanistan for almost 2 years. It gave me a nice chance to hear the perception of some of the foreign who were there, who are more an observer, since they cannot talk or understand the language. Who were there really JUST FOR JOB, good money. No romantic ideas that I have! And also they see how things are working, so no fancy fluffy imaginations. I really liked that!

The passports didn’t show up until 4 PM. Suddenly they announced you can get to the flight! We were very happy and surprise, but then we found out that was a “trick” white lie! to get every body quickly to the gate. We were transferred to a hotel some where in the city and they just gave us a piece of paper and said, you can come back tomorrow and get your passports. I was happy that at least I got to get my ticket, and suitcase.

In hotel we had to share our room, I was really annoyed I didn’t want to share my room with somebody who I do not know. We were 3 women, who were actually traveling sort of alone. An African, an old Afghan lady from Hazara’s area, and me. At that point I didn’t realize that the Afghan lady was alone, I thought the man who was with her was her son. (later I figured out that he was just a far relative trying to help her, with trip, amazing that she was absolutely illiterate) actually it came a little ugly, because when I was arguing that I do not want to share my room, (just as the principle that they messed up and I am not going to pay for it, too naive and stupid of me any way!) the African lady thought I do not want to share my room with her because she is black! And she kept cursing me and repeating “I have a god”! (well I might have a god too!) She was not listening to me a tall, also because she was just hearing the half of talks which was in English not my Persian words in arguing with other people. The old lady was saying I do not want to share my room with the black girl because she smells. Total nonsense! and it was such a wired situation. Also because the afghan lady was Hazara, during the war many Hazaras lived in Iran, and I could see the face of arrogant Iranian girl who is thinking she is superior! At the end I decided to stay with the old lady just because she was too much dependent, not even knowing how to use the lift! And any way me trying to talk to the African lady was not any use too! Honestly it was a good reminder of hey step back, there is no principle here! They even didn’t try to get their right! They even weren’t allowing me to ask why can’t we get our private room when we had paid for the flight, just accepting that if the airline says you have to share the room, means we have to share with no word! Also the whole black, Iranian , Hazare, thing was really wired! I had totally forgotten about the influence of prejudice, based on races and color.


It was not too bad, I was happy that I have a room and I can sleep. But I had to take care of afghan lady. She was funny, I suddenly had found a grandmother, who hardly could understand her accent, (afghans speak Dari, which is like Persian, but with different accent, often different word usage and grammar). We went to get lunch, the hotel was full of Iranians, who were there for holidays. I got to talk to couple of them. I really wanted to sleep.

Dubai

Sitting in an Irish bar in Dubai! it is 1:30 am, I just arrived after 6:30 hours flight! Drinking a light Amstel beer is very pleasant. This Emirate’s flight are pretty OK! I had a choice of choosing between 200 movies and TV shows, to read the BBC headlines, and so any entertainments, you can easily fly for days with out getting bored! I watched The Queens and pirates of Caribbean, the second one!
I had three sits for myself and I could just lay down, and watch my movies with a glass of not so good wine! Better than nothing though!
I have to say that I became a little emotional when we were flying above Shiraz! When I saw the lights of city and feeling that it is first time I am flying above Iran, and I’m not having the perspective of seeing my family in couple of hours. That felt weird!

Dubai airport is very big, it is a large hall with so many shops, it seems that every body here came to shop (or window shop). I can’t go out into city I need to get visa, and anyhow I ‘ll fly to Kabul in 8 hours.

I went to pick up my ticket from Afghan airline, Ariana, but they told me that I have to go to Kam Air, it seems my flight is different. Nevertheless I got my first chat with couple of people who were standing in the line. A Philippine guy who is doing his military service in Kabul. He was fund of Afghanistan, he showed me his ear stone and said you can find very nice stones in Kabul. He told me that Kabul is really cool! But do not go to Ghandehar, he said he was in ghandehar for a week, and it was every day a suicide bombers and he was so scared that he couldn’t stay any more, he had to beg his manager to send him back to Kabul.
And of course I got to see a Dutch guy! Gees I can’t even get read of Dutch in Afghanistan  He was an engineer, working for Shell, we chatted a little, and joked about what the heck Shell is doing in Afghanistan? There are some oil in Mazar-e-Sharif, and of course we joked about the pipe lines which are suppose to go trough Afghanistan, (when there is more security in the land to actually be able to pass the pipe lines!) but any how he was also a volunteer. using his vacations to start up a water project there, we didn’t talk that much about the project, typical Dutch. He didn’t want to give too much of information. I never get this part of the culture! Or maybe I am too direct wanting to go to the point right away and people scare that I want to get some thing from them! Or Simon would say maybe he was annoyed to see some body from the Netherlands!

The colure of people here is beautiful, it is full of Indian, Indonesian, lots of German, and Arabs. Feels very nice, I should come back here with Simon.

The palm trees in the middle of the hall of duty free are the main reminder of I’m in the Gulf area, reminder of Bandar Abbas, (in south of Iran). It is pretty impressive.

I can’t find the wire less internet I thought I’ll be able to find. I guess I could find it n the lounge of business class airline. Any way it is exciting. Tomorrow I’ll be in Kabul!

Damn! For an Amstel beer I paid 9 euros. This is the most expensive beer I’ve ever had in my life!